Being Gay in Professional Soccer: A Toxic Environment

“You don't belong on this earth” ... “What are you doing here?” ... “Don't take another breath.”

Since revealing he was gay in 2021, footballer the athlete has received daily death threats and abusive messages on social media.

“When I first saw these messages, it broke my heart,” the player states. “Nobody should have to endure such words.

“I'm trying to get better as a player and be the best I can be during matches, and then face criticism because of who I am. It's appalling.”

Midfielder the sportsman was playing for Adelaide United back in 2020 when he became the only openly gay elite soccer player in the world.

Recently he departed from Australia to join lower-tier club Peterborough Sports, who compete before audiences of about 400 in the sixth division, one level below of English football.

The 25-year-old combines playing for the semi-professional team by advocating for LGBTQ+ issues and using his profile - boasting over a million followers on social media - to promote fairness and acceptance.

“Definitely, we've got mountains to do,” Cavallo says when asked if football still has a problem with discrimination.

“I don't go more than a week without hearing about an issue.”

‘People want to harm me’

Several years passed for Cavallo to build up the bravery to say “I'm gay” before coming out on October 27th, 2021.

“All I want to do is compete in soccer and receive fair treatment,” he said in an accompanying video.

The player was 21 and making a name for himself at his Australian club in Australia's top flight when, backed by his colleagues, he announced his orientation publicly.

“The future was uncertain. I had no expectations,” he recalls. “The moment seemed appropriate in my life. I wanted to take the next step.”

His emotional coming out video, entitled ‘His Personal Story’, went viral on digital platforms.

“My mobile phone exploded with encouraging words. The response was incredible.”

A prominent club were one of many high-profile clubs around the world to show solidarity with the player, with the coach at the time Jurgen Klopp saying: “I'm really thankful that he did it because it sparks conversation.”

Barcelona defender Gerard Pique also offered support, writing on social media that “soccer culture is lagging behind and your actions drive progress”, while his former club issued a statement supporting their “extraordinary” and “courageous” player.

Some people, however, were less welcoming.

Cavallo quickly became a subject to anti-gay remarks by opposition fans.

In January 2022 a competing team were fined A$5,000 over anti-gay abuse from spectators directed at Cavallo during a match.

“The comments I encountered were painful and disparaging towards my community,” he says.

“I remained calm because I knew that would only feed the haters.”

A scary event occurred at a gas station in Australia, where Cavallo was assaulted by someone who recognised him from the media attention.

“That was a scary moment,” he remembers. “The thought crossed my mind ‘this is real - individuals intend to hurt me’.

“Should this be tolerated? Absolutely not. But through my disclosure, these are the consequences.

“My wish is that the next person who reveals their orientation while playing football at a high level won't face the journey I have experienced.”

Cavallo says the daily death threats and abusive messages have taken a toll on his mental health.

“It's disappointing because I am having to explain why I belong on the football field for being who I am,” he says.

“We don't sit straight people down and ask ‘what gives you the right in football?’.

“Many individuals see me as a cheerful, optimistic person. But there are days when I rely on my partner, his name, and he gets to see much of what occurs behind the scenes.”

‘Top-tier athlete revealing orientation would create waves’

The player's choice to disclose his orientation helped prompt teenage Blackpool forward another athlete to announce he was gay as the UK's only openly gay playing soccer professional in May 2022.

However, there are zero publicly LGBTQ athletes in the top English division.

“It would move mountains,” says the footballer on the impact a Premier League player revealing their orientation would make.

“But I'm not going to sugar-coat it. Numerous frightening aspects that would come this person's way. Within soccer culture, identifying as LGBTQ is a highly hostile environment.”

Over two decades after a pioneering player - the UK's initial out soccer professional - died by suicide in 1998, the current athlete has spoken about the “harmful male culture” that persists in men's football.

“Simply attend to a match and see the unfriendly atmosphere and masculinity that the audience creates,” he explains.

“There is still a lot of work to make sure there is a safe space in soccer for individuals like me and Jake.

“We haven't seen it (additional athletes revealing their orientation) as frequently as desired.

“I can only keep pushing for what I think is right, and strive for taking out the harmful male norms in football changing rooms and creating a safe space.”

‘I'm here to create change’

Cavallo says football has enabled discussions within team environments about revealing one's orientation.

However, he is critical of Fifa, after the Middle Eastern nation, where same-sex relationships are illegal, hosted the men's World Cup in 2022.

Future World Cup will be held in another Gulf state, where homosexuality is also illegal.

“Do I approve that the global championship is in countries that criminalise same-sex marriages, where individuals like myself will be imprisoned for just existing on that land? It's frightening,” says the athlete.

“I receive communications [from people living in these countries] saying ‘I face imprisonment for my identity - is assistance possible?’.

“It's devastating that individuals are incarcerated for being who they are.

“Certain nations that are significant soccer markets and they reject the queer community. Those are the countries that tend to target me.”

Nevertheless, the footballer says he won't cease advocating.

“Football has enabled dialogue in the locker room. It lets me communicate and educate people who want to learn more.

“Not everyone is going to like you for your identity. But I have found my family. I've connected with similar people.

“My mission is to create change. That's what I'm here for.”